CN

Believe it or not, Chuck Norris turns 80 today. As good a day as any to note some Chuck Norris jokes:

Chuck Norris beat the sun in a staring contest.

Chuck Norris can hear sign language.

Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.

Chuck Norris ended the "Never Ending Story."

Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris is the only person who can punch a Cyclops between the eyes.

Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.

Bigfoot claims he saw Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch.  He decides what time it is.

Under Chuck Norris's beard there isn't a chin. Only another fist.

Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

Bill Gates lives in fear that Chuck Norris's PC will crash.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

And so on and so forth.