Kiss Off

The Long Kiss Goodnight (1996) started as a hot script by Shane Black.  An action film about a secret agent with amnesia who regains her memory, it seemed a great vehicle for a top female star.  Geena Davis got the part and Renny Harlin, her husband, was named director.  Samuel L. Jackson had the male lead.

It flopped.

I'm surprised it hasn't become a cult hit. (Has it?) Whenever it's on TV, I usually watch a bit--especially the first half.  The final act goes on too long, and isn't as strong.  I guess the audience at large is turned off by the relentless and brutal violence, not to mention the harsh language. I think they also find it fairly ridiculous, since the heroes survive outrageous situations, often without a scratch.  And the audience tends to have a problem with a female lead in serious action.  They don't want to see, or have trouble buying, a woman (even Geena Davis) knocking out men right and left. Of course, it's just as ridiculous for Bruce Willis to do what he does in Die Hard (Renny Harlin directed the second one), but it's a convention action fans accept.

TLKG has flaws, no question, but it's a pretty lively story with a lot of fun dialogue.  In fact, the main reason I watch is for Samuel L. Jackson's sleazy investigator, who gets most of the good lines:

Geen Davis:  I got myself out of Beirut once, I think I can get out of New Jersey.
Samuel L. Jackson: Yeah? Well, don't be so sure. Others have tried and failed.

Geena Davis: I need a fake passport and I need money, lots of it.
Samuel L. Jackson: Well why didn't you say so? Hold on a minute while I pull that outta my ass.

Samuel L. Jackson: everyone knows, when you make an assumption, you make an ass out of "u" and "umption".

Geena Davis: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Samuel L. Jackson: I hope not, 'cause I'm thinking how much my balls hurt.

I recently watched it, this time all the way to the end.  I'd forgotten what it's ultimately about. (Spoiler ahead.) The bad guy explains the CIA is faking a Muslim terrorist bombing that'll kill several thousand.  He even brings up the 1993 bombing of the World Trade Center.  Yes, it's the classic evil CIA that can and will do anything. Plays pretty weird today.  Why haven't conspiracy nuts picked up on this film?